The Unofficial Story of Gymglish
Want to find out more about how and why Gymglish was born? Check out The Unofficial Story of Gymglish below. It was written in 2014 for our 10th anniversary and is absolutely, completely 100% factual.
As predicted by a Guatemalan horse jockey in the late 17th century, Gymglish (aka A9 SAS) was born on February 6th, 2004, weighing a hefty 8 pounds and 4 ounces. Baby Gymglish came out of his mother with a green afro, a red Gymglish t-shirt and a simple dream: to create a new approach to e-learning.
At a very young age, Gymglish was gifted an Artificial Intelligence Engine from a generous grandmother. Still, something was missing: a sense of humor. As nothing in France was available, an American was imported to help. Gymglish was ready to make its way in the world, with the most important tools in life: jokes and a robot.
To be successful, Gymglish needed a solid team with good people, not just unpaid interns. It was hiring season: job offers were posted, pigeons released, telegrams delivered. Mothers sent cousins, cousins called friends, and friends found candidates. Eventually, a short list was made: not with the most experienced or best-educated candidates, but with the most passionate. As everybody knows, in the Artificial Intelligence-powered online English teaching business, passion means everything.
As Gymglish began to enjoy some modest notoriety, people began to wonder what, if anything, Gymglish was selling. T-shirts? Lighters? Panties? English lessons? One thing was clear, whatever Gymglish was selling seemed to connect with the public, and word began to spread. Why? Was it the originality of the learning experience? The quality of customer service? The absence of traditional advertising strategies? Probably the lighters.
PS. We sell English lessons.
Diversity has always been a priority for Gymglish
ever since the government imposed strict regulations on hiring practices. The current Gymglish team is made up of 9 different nationalities and 25 different hairstyles - a healthy mix of personable geeks, charming salespeople, adorable content writers, occasional interns, and a part-time hot-dog vendor named Mickey. Other noteworthy figures: there are 9.75 Gymglish babies, 2 Gymglish dogs, 3 Gymglish tattoos and 1 dead mouse somewhere in the office. Can you spot them all?
Gymglish takes its office space very seriously, which is why it is composed of 75% plants, 25% dance floor and only 3% desks. Plants serve a variety of purposes: oxygen generation, camouflage, t-shirt storage, dead body hiding place and emergency food source. Did you know that Gymglish was once featured on national TV because we sometimes wear sandals? Serious stuff.
If there’s one thing that Gymglish can’t stand, besides venture capitalists and giraffes, it’s overpopulation. The Paris team was becoming fat and lazy. Besides, we needed more room for plants. Rather than secretly murdering employees one by one, it was decided to create other small teams abroad. Branch offices were thus opened in two countries chosen for their high crime rates, political tension and pleasant beaches: Brazil and Israel.
In accordance with the Geneva conventions, English was declared ‘obsolete’ in 2012. Gymglish quickly turned its attention to the alleged language of the future: French. Oui, oui, c’est vrai. Once the laughter dissipated, a new product was born - Frantastique (a classic story of aliens unfreezing Victor Hugo). After 8 years of messing around on an English training market that clearly had no potential, Gymglish was now ready to absorb the avalanche of French learners on the horizon.
As far back as we can remember, which isn’t very far, Gymglish has made it a priority to throw an annual party. After starting with a guest list of mainly clients, partners, friends and family, our most recent parties have featured police, firemen and paramedics, only 5 of whom were on duty.
As a matter of fact, this booklet is being distributed at our 10th anniversary party! Are you having fun? We hope so. Also, the toilets are to your left.
In summary: we send emails, we hate giraffes, we’re ten years old, and apparently French is the future. Thanks for your continued support... we continue to be both surprised and delighted by it! Merci.